Relocating to Utah

Deldon and I moved here in the spring of 04. Four months later in the Autumn of 04 as we were driving from San Francisco to Sacramento to visit for Deldon's Dad's birthday we decided to be on a " five year plan". I guess we meant it literally. We figured we would make the decision as to where to settle before Samantha started full-time school and that would be this coming September. We started seriously thinking of moving about 18 months ago and have talked and talked and talked about it. The time has come and it's basically now or never. We have tried to sell our home, but that hasn't happened with the horrible market crash here. We're looking at it as a long term investment at this stage and hope to rent it out by the time we leave. Deldon has really disliked his job choice for a while now, so with that he has decided to go back to school to do a construction management degree, construction is his passion, not financial services. He'll attend UVU as that is the easiest, quickest route to graduation and will only have to do 2 yrs if he goes full time. We want to be there a year before spring semester dates in 2010 to be able to get residency. Having said that, we may yet just decide to have him start in the Fall and pay the crazy out-of-state tuition just get on with the schooling instead of putting it off. He luckily has a job to go out to working for his Uncle's construction firm based in Provo.
How do I feel about it? Absolutely devastated to be honest. I have been bottling up and hiding my feelings even from Deldon. But now it is getting closer it has started to feel really real and I need to start dealing and facing my feelings more openly. I love the United States, and know long term this will be best for our family. I know I can be happy there, whereas Deldon has never been 100% happy living here (darn that Irish weather lol.) It's just going to be the initial leaving my tight family / friend /Church support network, oh and the 50% income reduction that we'll be experiencing that is panicking me. I wonder how we'll even feed our mouths at this stage lol and more seriously, if and when we'll ever have the money for me to set eyes on this green Isle again. I haven't mentioned it on this blog before now because we haven't talked about it much outside the family circle, we figured we'd wait until after the baby was born, and I didn't want to drag the whole moving thing out. In the past I have talked about moving and my sister has told me I have offended people. My way to deal with it has been to focus on the positives of the USA and the negatives of here. Stressful days lie ahead. I just hope I can get through them in one piece emotionally and mentally....maybe I should be reconsidering removing chocolate from my diet, I might be needing it.